Thursday, November 16, 2006

Raising Boys

This post is dedicated to Ashley, a friend who is expecting a baby boy just any day now. I have had several friends recently who have either had or adopted baby girls, and I honestly don't have a lot of advice about how to raise girls, other than to love them to pieces. Boys though...I can give all sorts of advice about raising boys. So Ashley, here is what you need to know about raising a boy:

1. Boys can be really gross. They have a huge fascination for burping...especially in public. While embarrassing to admit, I found a way to stop it though. I had a burping contest with my boys, and I won. The fascination is gone, and I am cool. So remember, you can gain respect with the small things and sometimes it pays to join in on the "fun".

2. Don't ever turn your back. Boys have this sense built into them that lets them know the minute you turn your back. When you do turn around, they will hit their siblings, run away, break a lamp, hide your car keys and do much, much worse things than these. The funny thing is that when you turn back around, they act like nothing has happened (unless they ran away...then you just can't find them).

3. You will never be fast enough. Little boys are quick, and they are squirmy. If they know that they are about to get in trouble, they will squirm out of your grasp, make a break for it and then run around as you chase them through the house, the backyard, the church building or McDonald's. They know that if they can just get you tired enough, you won't have any strength left to discipline them. I guess that makes them pretty smart too.

4. Boys hate the color least that is what my boys tell me. They try hard to be macho and tough guys, but they will scream like a girl when they see a bug on the bathroom floor. (Then they will proceed to smash it to smithereens with your favorite pair of shoes.)

5. Boys are truly gifts from God. I know...ALL children are gifts from God. Daughters are just as much a gift from God as sons are, but since this is about raising boys, I will focus on that for now. Ashley, when you look into the eyes of your baby boy for the first time, know that you are looking into the true and perfect image of God. From that point on, God is entrusting you to raise this tiny little boy to be a servant for Him. Your son will be the spiritual leader of His home and a servant leader for His Kingdom. Embrace and encourage his talents, correct his faults, and commit him wholly and totally to the Father. It is a huge responsibility, but it has many rewards. May God bless you guys as you raise this boy.

Oh...I almost forgot. Always have a cloth of some kind handy when you are changing his diaper. If you don't, you will be "christened" every time! From experience, their aim is pretty good and distance is amazing...just ask the lady coming out of the stall at Home Depot back in June of 2001.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Our Family Portrait

We now have a new family portrait by our favorite artist. What do you think?

As you have probably already guessed, David is our wonderful and favorite artist. Just to make sure you understand his art, I will provide a few explanations.

David is on the far left sporting his favorite #6 Wildcats football jersey (and for some reason is bald...maybe he was anticipating his haircut today). Then you have me wearing a blue Broncos football jersey with the number 7. Nathan (who looks somewhat like a caterpillar in the beginning stages of building a cocoon) is wearing his red shirt with black and yellow stripes and is also quite bald. Finally, we have Brian on the right. Brian is also wearing a Broncos football jersey and has very large and very yellow ears. is a perfect rendering of our family!

Monday, November 06, 2006

Halloween Recap

It's been a long time since I have posted, so I have a lot to cover! First of all, we survived Halloween. David was his favorite high school football player, Luke Tribble, and Nathan was a pumpkin WITH A STEM. (Big emphasis on the with a stem part!) The boys enjoyed trick-or-treating around the neighborhood, and we also went to the houses of some good friends and most importantly, Luke Tribble.

The boys had asked me what I was going to be for Halloween, and I told them I was going to dress up as a mommy. David said, "You can't do that! You should be a princess." I asked Nathan what he thought I should be and he said, "A toaster." I am not quite sure how to take that.

This was the year that I really tried to work on Halloween etiquette with the boys, and that wasn't easy for two boys who say it like it is. At one house, the boys got candy and a pencil. As we were walking away, David asks loud enough for the lady who gave it to him to hear, "WHY did they give us a pencil?!" I tried to recover the situation by smiling big and saying, "What a great thing to get at Halloween! It is a special treat and you LOVE to draw! I wish I had a pencil like that!" As soon as the door closed, I hissed, "THAT was NOT nice. I don't care what they put in your bag. You smile. You say thank you, and unless you have something good to say, you keep your mouth shut!" (Don't you remember speeches like that when you were a kid? I am not exactly sure just when I became my mom, but her little speeches just flow out of me in situations like that!)

Just across the street from that house, Nathan thought the lady gave him a package of soap for some reason and launched into a "soap and water can make you very clean" lecture. This time, I just smiled and said thanks and quickly rushed him away from the house. Additionally, any time anybody commented on Nathan being a pumpkin, he would have to correct them and say in an exasperated voice, "I am a pumpkin WITH A STEM!" The very hardest part about trick-or-treating with Nathan was that he wanted to go inside everyone's house when they opened the door. So, we would have to quickly grab him before he made a mad dash to get inside.

By the end of trick-or-treating, the boys did get the hang of saying thank you at each house without being prompted, and Nathan even decided to step his thank you a notch and started telling everyone gracias after they gave him candy. They had a great time and Nathan fell asleep on David's shoulderpad on our way home. All in all, it was a great night!